This short "Romantic Memo" contains thoughts, observations, research and ideas about Keeping RomanceAlive  in relationships.


What a day. Traffic was terrible. Went down Hyde Street and….”.

You could have taken the Loop and avoided that congestion?”

I know, but I was trying to get to America’s Mart to...

“It’s easier to get to the backstreet parking deck from Sutter.”\

Yes, but I was meeting Gerry for coffee and you’ll…

You could have met by the Metro then taken it downtown. No traffic. No frustration.”

Kathy was proud of herself. She’d provided Jan with a simple solution to his problem – nice, neat and tied up with a bow.


Jan wanted to share with Kathy how he’d met the actor Cargill Serone at the coffee shop. Cargill offered to introduce him to a major buyer. If he hadn’t met Gerry at that particular coffee shop and that particular moment, he would have missed out.

But Kathy was so focused on finding a solution, she didn’t even let Jan share the invitation: a weekend at the beach he, rather they’d received from Cargill.

Ever had this happen to you?

Ever been guilty of not really listening?

I have been.

How many opportunities for romance have been missed because someone didn’t listen?

Romancing your sweetheart requires you to:

  • Listen to what your sweetheart says about likes and dislikes.
  • Observe how your sweetheart responds and reacts to different romantic ideas.
  • Remember which ideas receive the best response.

Take these three actions and you learn how your sweetheart prefers to be romanced.

You can half-listen. Jump to conclusions. Interrupt. And you won’t learn your sweetheart’s romantic preference. You won’t cultivate a relationship where romance is prized.

Patiently listen until you really understand what your sweetheart wants to communicate to you. Once you’ve learned to listen, observe and remember what’s shared, you’ll really be ready to romance your sweetheart

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